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Did You Lose Some Weight?

Yes, I did, thank you for noticing. There’s more to the story than that, though; and the most significant amount of weight I lost is emotional. It has taken nearly a year and a half to lose about 25 pounds and I lost some of it more than once.

It actually started by attending a Fearless Foundation Workshop® (FFW) led by Rhonda Britten. It was here that I gained my first glimpse of myself as being acceptable even though I wasn’t perfect. During this workshop, Rhonda shares 2 tools she has designed to help people understand where and how fear shows up in our lives so we can start to choose our responses instead of reacting blindly: the Wheel of Fear and the Wheel of Freedom. By learning my wheels I was able to recognize that it was fear that always made me feel responsible for all the bad feelings or bad events that people had when I was around.

So the first weight I lost was several huge rocks of guilt, shame, and a false sense of responsibility for fixing situations and people. It is actually rather hard to describe how much of a revelation and release this was and almost instantly my spirit felt a new lightness.

From that point, as I began to recognize things that I liked about myself, and began giving myself credit for what I did – instead of only taking blame when things went wrong – I started to recognize how often I turned to food for comfort or companionship and started choosing different eating habits.

The FFW had been in October. In January I attended a Fearless Conversations Workshop® with many of the same people who had been at the FFW and several of them commented on how good I looked and how much weight I had lost. The odd thing was those compliments didn’t feel good to me. I let my Wheel of Fear spin those compliments into

judgments against me for being so vain and wanting to look better than I deserved to look. Fear took control of my eating again, and shortly after that 2nd workshop, I put every ounce right back on. I would remain the pudgy self I was accustomed to for several more months.

None-the-less, I continued to study and practice the tools and teachings of Fearless Living – particularly the Gratitudes (see blog “What Good Happened Around You Today?” from April 21) and Acknowledgements (see blog “Did You Do Anything Worthwhile Today?” from May 18) and my self-respect and self-acceptance grew stronger. I chose to give up both my pity eating and my recreational eating. I also gave up what I call filler eating – basically anything that has no nutritional value like chips and soda pop. I chose new ways to reward myself for finishing tasks that didn’t involve food – like game time with my kids, watching a movie, or some other fun activity with friends like hiking.

This time, rather than go on a diet, I carefully chose several life style changes that supported me in eating more reasonably for my activity level. I also added a short and entertaining workout routine to do 3 or 4 times a week and made more of a point of working my schedule to include more walking and less driving for short trips (less than 1 mile).

This time, the weight loss has not been about how I look, it has been how I am willing to treat myself. Now it is about self-respect rather than an external judgement about my weight or shape based on fashion.

Perhaps body weight is not your issue, yet most of us have one or two areas of our lives where we feel particularly bad about ourselves. Where are you burdened with the weight of regret, guilt, or a sense of “not good enough?”

Would you like to appreciate yourself more completely? Call me, tell me what you would like to change and let’s work out your plan.

#fearlessliving #acknowledgements #weightloss #selfacceptance #RhondaBritten #gratitude #change #lifestyle #selfhelp #lifecoaching